tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61988134662013405542012-01-02T01:56:32.726-05:00For the individual who enjoys nautical endeavors on boats as much as Sir Boats A LotSir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.comBlogger121100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-63256928290119716572008-06-20T11:27:00.005-04:002011-03-16T20:39:01.628-04:00

I'm a big boat advocate. My wife Carol and I are having, in terms of nautical lingo, "a squall." My wife, she's kinda uppity, even for someone who's uppity. Even uppity people think she's uppity. And the most uppity people just think she's a bitch. Uppity boaters refer to her as an anchor. I thought that was just a figure of speech until my uppity friend threw her off my boat The Los Angeles

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-50014856719248973132008-06-12T18:54:00.005-04:002008-06-14T00:50:04.336-04:00

I like boats. I don't like golf. I've already blogged about this. I said that I wouldn't play golf unless they somehow managed to build a golf course on a boat.Well, they did. This is a picture of the S.S. Tiger Woods. That's right, Tiger Woods has made so much money that he was able to purchase an aircraft carrier, design a golf course and build his golf course on his aircraft carrier. Mr. Woods

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-21643920679378566672008-06-09T12:51:00.002-04:002008-06-09T12:53:14.626-04:00

Now Mr. Howell, there is a guy you could count on. He was a billionaire! You don’t just wake up one day with that kind of money. You have to earn that money by swindling honest, hard working people out of millions of dollars in shady real estate transactions and monopolizing industries such as diamond mines and railroads. The man owned downtown Denver for God’s sake! That has to make you at least

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-12428768062778018962008-06-09T04:33:00.005-04:002008-06-09T12:49:59.280-04:00

"Speaking of "portly." I guess we know where all those "Free lunches went."I like boats. I like stories about boats, I like books about boats, movies about boats and of course television shows that revolve around boats and/or boating. I sometimes watch/read/watch and read about boats while I am on my boat, boating at the same time. That’s like 2 times the boating power of just regular boating.

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-73573173518941195592008-06-06T14:36:00.011-04:002008-06-06T15:44:01.270-04:00

I like boats. I don't like fishing that much. I do however enjoy people falling off boats. Some would argue that falling off boats or boat related injuries are not funny. Those people would be wrong. Throughout the years fishing has made for some of the all-time great boating bloopers and no one has been more blooper blessed than Bill Dance. Bill has a boat. Bill has a boatload of boat bloopers.

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-54605607769829158942008-06-02T16:22:00.004-04:002008-06-02T16:29:22.940-04:00

I like boats. I don't like my shrink. I am court ordered to post this.From the desk of Arthur Jantov, PsychologistDuring our first meeting, Sir Boats-A-Lot, who I will from here on refer to as “Boatsie Collins”, “Boatsie C.” or just “Boatsie” (hey I can have some fun in my life too, OK?) was insistent to the point of threatening my life with a paperweight if I did not have the latest issues of

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-12983090635871878832008-06-01T17:39:00.013-04:002008-06-01T18:26:24.778-04:00

Let me start off by saying I like boats.My wife Carol made me go to Boataholics Anonymous today. I don't appreciate that because it takes time away from boating and boating related activities, not unlike boating. I didn't understand why I had to go. I'm not addicted to boatahol, I've never even SEEN boatahol!She said I had to go to save my marriage. I said, I'd rather be married to my boat. And

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-24762659559339350522008-05-30T15:37:00.003-04:002008-05-30T15:45:06.232-04:00

A good friend of the Boating Enthusiast Digest is Mr. Bosch. He was kind enough to draw this devastatingly accurate portrait of me on one of my many boats. We thank Mr. Bosch kindly and may we all bask in his artistic excellence.

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-72069076565672341682008-05-30T15:24:00.004-04:002008-05-30T23:02:55.273-04:00

I like boating.See my problem is that I love boating, possibly too much. Now my doctor says that stress and strain of being a boat owner, or yachtsman, as we in the boating community like to be called, is taking it’s toll on my health. He says I’m fixated on boats. As if? He says I should quit boating. As if! The day I quit boating is the day my schooner meets a watery grave.My doctor says that

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-72175023995628277212008-05-30T13:19:00.005-04:002008-05-30T13:28:56.972-04:00

Horton Hears a Boat!(image courtesy of nicolekiss.blogspot.com)Martha: You know I love boats.Georgine: I like big hats.Martha: Well, then you can just swim back to shore! (pushes her out)

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-17307565427662458072008-05-29T19:17:00.000-04:002008-05-29T19:19:01.681-04:00

I like big boats and I cannot lie.You other sailors can’t deny itWhen a captain rolls in with an itty bitty mastAnd you hit that motor fastYou get sunkWanna drop my anchorWhen I notice that my cannon sank herDeep in the boat she’s sailingI’m steering but I can’t stop whalingOh lady I wanna get with yaYou can ride this SkipperMy first mate tried to warn meWith a boat like that thoughI’d sail

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6198813466201340554.post-15638299445394316682008-05-29T17:26:00.000-04:002008-05-29T18:33:59.554-04:00

The world. It’s a vast landscape. And you know what’s on that landscape? Boats.Look, I love boating. Like, a lot, a lot. Some people would call me an “enthusiast” but I think it’s something more. I like everything that nautical watercraft and sea worthy vessels have to offer. Freaking jigger-masts, sail-plans, halyards, oars, mizzen-masts, fore-masts, main-mast, pretty much any kind of mast,

Sir Boats-A-Lothttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16345186852852189728noreply@blogger.com1